Right?

 

It starts off as a choice, one where you choose to skip a meal, no big deal, right? It makes you feel better, you're weightless and you feel like you could run a thousand miles and not stop. After that you convince yourself that you can also skip that snack you usually have between breakfast and lunch, besides coffee is quite enough. And while you're at it, you might as well skip lunch. You can always have more coffee, or even better, a nice bottle of water. After lunch passes it's time for a snack you're still in control and choose some cheese or an apple. Nothing too filling because dinner is coming and that's harder to avoid. Dinner comes and it's all you can do to not shove everything down your throat, after all you've barely eaten. so you load up your plate to make up for skipping all of those meals earlier. You don't think much of anything while you munch away and laugh and converse with those at the dinner table. It isn't until later when it hits you, that feeling, you no longer feel weightless; and out of the darkness comes a voice, one that you haven't heard before. A sickeningly sweet voice that whispers how It can help you get the control you need, all you have to do is listen to everything It says.

"Control" that voice knows exactly what to say and you're instantly hooked. Because, if you're in control that means you're perfect. Of course It starts off slow and encourages coffee and a granola bar in the morning. Nothing else all day. The next day is the exact same: coffee and granola. After only two days you start to feel weightless again. After only two days your jeans are looser and you're slowly falling into Its trap. It backs off for a little while, after all you've seen success and It trusts that you know what you need to do. But now you're on your own, terrified, and you feel yourself slipping. And so you fall back into old habits, eating when you get hungry (gasp!). Your jeans don't fit as well as they were starting to. Finally It comes back. Meaner and harsher than before, you broke It's trust. It told you what you needed to do and you just let it all go out the window. It tells you, only coffee, tea, and water from now. And you listen, because you finally have a friend, one who swears they won't leave until you are perfect and in control. What you don't seem to realize is that this "friend" that promised you these things is slowly taking it all away. It is taking even more than control, It is robbing you of everything, but you either don't notice or don't care. People are noticing a change, they comment on it. "Have you lost weight? You look really good" and first it's "yes, 8 pounds" but then 8 turns to 16 and 16 turns to 18. People say you're getting too thin but you don't care. When you look in the mirror you don't see it and that voice is whispering how you still have such a long way to go. And you agree, you stand in front of the mirror, forever, dissecting every little flaw; whether real or imaginary, you can't tell at this point. It has taken over and you don't care because you still think you're in control. And if you can "keep" this control you'll be absolutely perfect.

Control and perfection it's all you need, right?